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Dear MeDear Me, 
Right about now, you, my 13-year old self, is most likely sobbing in a corner at school. Again. Because the mean kids in class wouldn't stop bullying you again, because the mean kids won't accept you for who you are. Or maybe right now you are talking really bad behind a friends back so you can come across as "cool" and score some "cool-points" with the same mean kids that will bully you just the same tomorrow. I know it seems endless, and maybe it is. But I also know this; you will get through this. And you can get through this. Trust me, I know. 
The best thing you can do right now is to just stop sobbing, hold your head up high and face the world, even if that world doesn't want to face you. Don't go buying that dumb, expensive t-shirt that all the popular kids have, and most importantly: don't try to be something, or someone, you're not. Because I know now that you are not like them. You are not mean. You do not "hate" people
Let Golet go of all the times we smiled
let go of all the times we cried
let go
of all the memories
we created together
and just
move on
...and break my heart...

untitledFear the lust of
a passionate heart
it might catch you
and run with you,
The metal gently
kisses the skin
covering her wrist
in blood
in front of her eyes
deep into the night
she will find her peace
in death.
DearestThe big puffy clouds
            in a deep blue sky
will always serve
            as a reminder
A reminder of our days
                before the clouds
                                        found you.
They found you 
                    adopted you
                                                                    as one of their own...
A Touch of Madnessthey say a touch of madness
glimmers there behind her eyes,
          sparking storms that sing with light
                                  and haunting lullabies
They say a touch of madness,

is inside all of of us
speaking words we never would,
waiting, at the windowsill. 
It glimmers there behind her eyes,
waiting, longing
for the day of darkness,
it finally gets to be free.
Sparking storms that sing with light,
rolling thunder and flashing
lightning on the inside
of her mind.
Haunting lullabies
are softly singing
the never-spoken words
of madness
You were the sunSnow, white and pure, leading me closer to the fabric of my dreams. I was the moon, and you, you were the golden sun. Your voice is ripping through the silence of my days, lingering inside my own thoughts. Lingering, lingering, my dreams are nothing more than a speck of dust in my existence. Clouds are stuffed in my lungs making it harder and harder to breathe, but the little girl looking at the big red balloon is what keeps me ashore. Inside the balloon awaits her dream, a dream that once was mine to dream. 
Push me forward with my head through the clouds and help me fly, for I can not do it on my own. Help me fly so I can learn how to stand on my own feet and maybe, maybe I can stop tripping over the words I'll never speak. But don't hold me down under the water where I can not breath, don't hold me down for it puts my lungs on fire and brings my eyes to tears. 
Voices are calling me, silently, gently laying me to rest, paint
Every DayOh darling, just take it slow, for you know- the wind will always be there to move your hair.
You came through my life like a hurricane in red- and even though I promised myself long ago not to write about you, I can’t help but be overwhelmed by memories of our days together, our days in the sun. I remember how we wished those days would never end, how we wished we’d be together forever. How we wished, oh, how we wished..
You promised.
You would never let me break, you would never leave me alone. You would always be here, with me. You promised… and you left.
You left.
You left me alone with all my fears, to battle them on my own and eventually- I gave up. I gave up, because I didn’t have you. I gave up, because you were gone. And no, I am not trying to make you feel guilty- I’m just telling you how I feel.
Oh darling- it’s been so long since I’ve seen you and there are no words to describe how much I miss you. How much I miss our
It's okaylie to me
and tell me i'm wrong
tell me i'm wrong to get in
to the water
gleaming eyes
are fixed upon their reflections
lie to me
and tell me it's not worth it
tell me
i can do better than this
lie to me
and tell me it's okay
to be broken
tell me the bones
will heal
one day
lie to me
and tell me
that i am not falling
like a shooting star
in the night sky
lie to me
and tell me
that you will catch me
before i hit the ground




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Artist | Photography


"Great photography is about depth of feeling, not depth of field"

- Peter Adams

Hi all!
A little mystery in the title this time ;) (I couldn't fit it all in... Grump ) Today we are here for a Self-portraits feature with the always lovely RockstarVanity


You are one of the General Photography CVs here on DA, could you tell us a little about yourself, and what you do as a CV?
I've been taking photos for as long as I can remember and doing it seriously for over a decade. Having studied photography at college, I ran my own studio for a few years before ongoing health problems made it impractical to continue so now I do photography mostly for my own enjoyment with just a few occasional professional commissions when I'm able to.

As a CV, my main mission is to serve the photography community on DA. This involves featuring Daily Deviations (which is one of my favourite things ever!), posting features and educational articles, working with the teams at CRPhotography and projecteducate, and generally supporting and encouraging photographers in any way that I can.

Broken Holga Self-Portrait by RockstarVanity

You picked the subcategory self-portraits for this feature. When looking at your gallery, we can see you do many other things than that as well. Why did you decide to go with self-portraits? And what does this sub-category mean to you?
Self-portraits have always had a special place in my heart. When I first became ill almost twelve years ago, I was really sad about not being able to go out and take pictures so I looked for things to photograph that were accessible to me. My own face and body were among those things and through self-portraiture I found a new way to express my own feelings and experiences. I had a lot of anger at my situation back then so most of my early self-portraits were quite violent. It was like art therapy and helped me through some really tough, scary times.

I feel like self-portraits on DA, and the internet in general, often get a lot of negativity thrown at them, especially when the artists are female and/or young. I think it's ridiculous to assume that artistic intent and merit are attached to subject matter. If a photo of another person or a mountain or a sunset or a flower can be artistic, creative and amazing, why can a photo of the photographer themselves not be?

Self-portraiture is a bit of a gateway drug! When you're just getting into photography and perhaps don't have access to, or the confidence to work with, other people as models, putting yourself in your pictures can be a great way to learn as well as to experience the 'other side' of the camera. So yes, the self-portraits gallery here (like all other galleries) has its fair share of not exactly professional works but it also has an abundance of stunning images created by extremely skills artists, and photographers at every level deserve to have their efforts celebrated. I feel like I say this all the time, but photography is for everyone!

A Riot of Wings by RockstarVanity

Do you have some tips for us to take self-portraits? Are there any must-haves, or is all we need a camera?
Just do it! I've spoken to people who have never taken a self-portrait because they don't feel they're beautiful enough or interesting enough, which is ridiculous because not only is everyone beautiful and interesting in their own way, but also photography shouldn't just be of people with one type of outward appearance. Art should not be about homogeneity. Self-portraiture creates an incredible opportunity to share yourself, your thoughts and your life with the world in a valuable and creative way.

Useful (but by no means necessary!) things to have for self-portraiture are a tripod to hold your camera and a remote or sync lead to operate the shutter from a distance. I'd like to share a technique I used a lot when I was first starting to experiment with self-portraiture. If you're using a digital camera that has live view on a screen on the back, set up a mirror behind it so when you're pointing the camera at yourself, you can see the screen in the mirror and get an idea of how the picture will look.

Full Spectrum Sunset by RockstarVanity

Rhythm In Motion by RockstarVanity

If you enjoyed these works from RockstarVanity's gallery, make sure to check out the rest of her gallery!

Now: Feature time!

Death Comes Loud by Iskaeldt
RockstarVanityIskaeldt has a gallery full of haunting atmospheric photos and this monochrome self-portrait is no exception.

Self Confinement by guessforfree
Soft and delicate with a delightful colour palette, guessforfree's self-portrait is thoughtfully composed and hints at a deeper story waiting to be told.

self-portrait with Rufus by grezelle
Yuukon: The black and white creates a great contrast between Rufus and grezelle's hair, making for a captivating self-portrait with a lot to discover.

Untitled Self Portrait by jonniedee
I have a weakness for artistic self-portraits where the photographer can be seen holding the camera and jonniedee's picture is a great example of that.

Red II by sofiawilhelmina
With the muted colours and film-like processing in this picture, sofiawilhelmina shows that simplicity can be wonderfully effective in self-portraiture.

:The Art of Reflection series: by RapidHeartMovement
Yuukon: RapidHeartMovement has a gallery full of strong, emotional photographs, and this one is no exception to that.

You Should Have Listened by LifeLustingDreamer
The contrast between LifeLustingDreamer's unassuming expression and the vibrant blood splashes makes for a striking and mysterious self-portrait.

The Last Emperor of Riverstreet Bay by Peterix
RockstarVanityPeterix has a knack for creating characters with his self-portraits - something that takes skill and vision on both sides of the camera.

sensual by nefregigi
Yuukon: Softness and elegance is all this self-portrait needed to turn out great.

S T Y L E II by Dan-Heffer
RockstarVanity: Combining self-portraiture with fashion photography, Dan-Heffer shoots photos with an editorial style that wouldn't be out of place in a magazine feature.

Tribal Mood by K-E-I-T
RockstarVanity: Stunning make-up! K-E-I-T's body paint work combined with a strong, direct facial expression make this self-portrait beautiful and memorable.

Angela by LadyMartist

Yuukon: Calmness surrounded by the chaos of movement. I absolutely love LadyMartist's expression in this somewhat chaotic photograph.

I'm gonna shoot you! by Cinestress
RockstarVanityCinestress is a photographer, writer, performer and filmmaker who does amazing work in the horror genre. This self-portrait captures those elements of her personality and experience perfectly.

Queen of Ice by Lulu-fayette
RockstarVanityLulu-fayette has created a stunning look with make-up that effectively ties her character to the backdrop of a snowy landscape. This is pure winter in photograph form.

Untitled by mary-jeanne
Yuukon: With clever use of composition and reflections, mary-jeanne created a simple, yet stunning self-portrait.

Don't forget to check out the galleries of the artists that we featured here, they have many more awesome works!

We hope you enjoyed this feature!

If you come across an awesome photograph from the general photography sections, make sure to send it to RockstarVanity  as a DD Suggestion!
You can find her DD Guidelines here: DD Suggestion Guidelines

Avatar request dydorova
Yuukon & RockstarVanity 

Cucumber or tomato? 

113 deviants said Cucumber :shakepickle: by Helen-Baq
105 deviants said Tomato shaketomato by ncfwhitetigress


Hey guys! :happy-wave: 
If you've recently sent me a note or other kind of message and haven't heard back from me yet, I can promise you I will soon! I've recently started a new job that has kept me very busy, but things will hopefully slow down a little soon (aka, not taking work home anymore). I've got too much work to do. 
I pinky-promise I will get to all your messages as soon as I can! :heart: rvmp 
Hey, you! Yes, you! Are you into macro photography? And do you want to join a contest? Good! Go here: 

Join us today at 10AM PST / 6PM GMT for a fun chat event at #PhotographyGuide!

Details in here: 
We've all come across an art-thief on or off DA at least once in our online lifetime, however, there are good and bad ways to deal with it. Read how you should and shouldn't deal with these people in Stygma's journal!

Got Llama?


Add a Comment:
Crying-Willow-76 Featured By Owner 2 days ago  New Deviant Hobbyist Digital Artist
Yuukon Featured By Owner 1 day ago   Photographer
Aww, thanks!
Crying-Willow-76 Featured By Owner 1 day ago  New Deviant Hobbyist Digital Artist
andersartigkeit Featured By Owner 3 days ago  Hobbyist Photographer
Hey :wave: Thank you so much for the watch :hug: Really appreciated! :happybounce:

If you want you can support me on Facebook ;)… I would be really happy about it! :happybounce:

Instagram? andersartigkeit

Best wishes!
Yuukon Featured By Owner 2 days ago   Photographer
You're welcome!
SoPhoenix Featured By Owner 3 days ago  Professional General Artist
Thanks for the llama! :D
Yuukon Featured By Owner 2 days ago   Photographer
You're welcome!
lemgras330 Featured By Owner 3 days ago  Hobbyist Artisan Crafter
Bunny Emoji-20 (Loving it) [V1] 
Yuukon Featured By Owner 2 days ago   Photographer
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